Rebirth

I’ve been away. It seems like this happens from time to time. Maybe you’re sick of it. Maybe you haven’t even noticed. Maybe you’ve been worried. Maybe, just maybe you’re glad I’ve come back.

I’m hoping it’s that last one.

What have I been doing? Repairing myself. I suffer from various brain maladies and over the last couple of years, I have been working desperately hard to get the worst of it under control. Things got bad for awhile. You really don’t want to know how bad, but I assure you, it was awful. One of the worst things about it was the loss of creativity. Nothing worked. I forced out a few things, but they were god awful and nothing I would really want to show anyone.

Several months ago, however, I started drawing again. I made myself do it at first. The results were surprising. I was much better than I remembered. What’s more, I enjoyed it infinitely more than I could have suspected. It was almost entirely doodles, but they were lovely little things that I was actually proud of. I am not used to feeling proud of my work. Slowly, over the next few months, I got better. I don’t just mean at drawing, I mean my mind just started to get better. The things that were wrong were suddenly, I don’t know, less wrong.

I started to remember that “good” was a way I could feel.

So here we are. I’ve torn this site down and rebuilt it several times over the years. Countless posts have been removed and in many cases utterly destroyed. It is in my nature to obliterate the past to pave way for the future. Most of the stories and posts from the site’s most recent iteration still exist. A few may turn back up in some form or another. Aside from that though, I’m just going to post whatever I feel like. No focus, no theme, no anything. I’ll write some articles, do some movie reviews, hammer out some fiction, talk about books, wax philosophical about the nature of reality, and am in the process of developing a comic, which will start to show up here when I start to have actual strips ready.

I’m really looking forward to that last bit and am hopeful it will eventually take over the bulk of the site.

Things have been hard. Those that are still with me, still paying attention to what I have to say, thank you. I’m sorry it took so long. I was lost in the dark, but now I’ve got a map and a flashlight. If you’re lost too, start calling out, I’ll try to find you and we’ll get out of the black together. If you’re already on the other side, call out anyway so the rest of us can follow your voice.

Love always,

-Godzilla Jones.

7 thoughts on “Rebirth

  1. At some point we are or have been in the darkest of dark places….it’s the realization that we are together there that saves us. Keep up the good fight my friend, you are never as alone as you may feel.

  2. This. It’s inspiring to read this. I admit being scattershot in reading anything, but lately I’ve been drawn to your fb posts and I followed this one to here, read this, related, felts the feels and I’m deciding as I write this response to also “find a map and flashlight”. Thank you.

  3. Thank you for your comment. It means a lot to know that maybe I’m helping someone. I’ve written a much longer post about finding my map, but it’s a bit embarrassing and I’m struggling with whether to actually post it or not. Your comment shows me that maybe I should.

    Stay strong. Be safe. Much love.

Leave a Reply to Busey Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published.

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>